Ok so, in the Middle-East, maids are very commonplace. Anyone from the paupers to the wealthy and everyone in between could employ them, and some people do and others don't. Having a maid is by no means some sort of status symbol. Ultimately it's a personal decision and the choice of the family looking to employ one. Everyone has a different situation though, so basing one's decision on other people's experiences may not always work.
I've heard stories of families choosing not to have a maid because they like taking care of their own house and family, they feel uncomfortable with a stranger in their home, there is no need for one, etc. etc. the list goes on and on. I've also heard of varying experiences that families have had who have chosen to employ a maid. Everything from firing the maid because the woman of the household felt her to be a threat to her marriage to having the most amazing maid that she has become part of the family!
There's this new book that's out now called "An Unsolicited Gift," by psychiatrist Dr. Dennis Friedman and it claims that boys who are raised by maids or nannies will grow up to be womanizers! The reason behind this theory is based on the idea that the child will get used to the fact that two women are taking care of him; one woman is his mother, the one he admires and respects and the other is the one who takes care of all the physical things, prepares meals, cleans the house, does the laundry and other chores. Having grown up in an environment where he has seen that it takes more than one woman to take care of him, the son, now a married adult, may seek out another woman, outside his marriage. Dr. Friedman also mentions that when a girl is raised with a nanny, a "cascade of need" is created where some females might later fill in with detrimental relationships, drugs and alcohol. Why the negativity?? Can't they fill this need with things that are fulfilling and proactive? Dr. Friedman's does, however, say that it would be "safe" to get hired help after the first year.
In Islam, cheating on a spouse is haram and forbidden. So as not to form an illicit relationship, among other reasons, a man is allowed to marry up to four wives, so long as he is able to treat all of them fairly and equally and is able to support all of them financially as well. And of course, pre-marital relationships, alcohol and drugs are all forbiddenn as well. So, I guess the most important thing to note is having a stable familial base and teaching strong moral values might be what effects a child the most.
Maid or no maid, Insha'Allah our children, brothers, sisters, cousins, all grow up to be intelligent, stable-minded, rational adults who are able to make the right decisions in life. Ameen!
Ramadan started yesterday August 11 and it is truly the most beautiful time of year. For those that are not aware of Ramadan, it's the most important time of year for Muslims. It is a month of fasting, prayer and zakat (almsgiving) and the best time for reflection and doing good.
Fasting is the fourth pillar in Islam and for good reason. By fasting, we learn to appreciate the value of food and drink by not having them from sunrise to sunset and we in turn become grateful for them. There are so many people and animals that go hungry on a daily basis due to poverty and homelessness and during Ramadan we become more aware of their feelings. If you are able to feed the hungry and help the poor and needy by donating, food, clothing or just simply helping someone out who may need you, it's truly an honor.
It is also importatnt to treat everyone with love and respect and forgive others, because remember nobody is perfect and we all make mistakes. If somebody has wronged you in the past, find a way in your heart to forgive them and if you have wronged someone else, you should ask for their forgiveness. The Prophet (ṣall Allahu ʿalayhi wa sallam) said, "A person only increases honour by forgiving."
Ensuring that our words, actions, and appearance are humble and respectable, along with everything else I discussed are attributes we should strive for on a daily basis, but if you haven't always done so in the past, it's never too late to start, during Ramadan especially.
Ramadan Kareem wa kul 'am wa intom bi alf alf khayr!
"There is such a business these days based on being critical...who wore the worst dress, who had the worst cellulite-it just, you know, hurts your soul. At the end of the day, you're just going to a big party."
-Christina Hendricks, from her interview with LA Times Magazine. She's absolutely stunning and an amazing actress. To read the entire interview, go HERE
While we're on the topic, it's important to remember that if we are ever going to criticize someone, it should always be constructive criticism and it should be done at the right time, in private, with whomever it is you are speaking with. You should always keep in mind other people's feelings. Criticism should always be out of love and nothing else.
Seriously, I was horrified when I was flipping through the channels the other night and came across an infomercial for....are you ready for this.... padded underwear. *blank stare* This "special" underwear comes with some sort of padding made to give the appearance of a more ample derriere, so to speak. Why, you might ask? Apparently, this summer is the season for big booties to be in style. Now I'm not a fan of body parts going in and out of style, I would much rather prefer that it were shoe styles being monitored.
Seriously though, whatever happened to loving yourself as you are and unconditionally? Being yourself cuz you're unique and beautiful no matter what? This is just teaching girls to want to be someone they're not, just because it happens to be en vogue at the moment. And, it promotes lying lol! Look, bottom line (no pun intended) is that curvy girls are beautiful, skinny girls are beautiful, and everyone in between is just as beautiful.
Just be yourself! And don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
Ok so, in the Middle-East, maids are very commonplace. Anyone from the paupers to the wealthy and everyone in between could employ them, and some people do and others don't. Having a maid is by no means some sort of status symbol. Ultimately it's a personal decision and the choice of the family looking to employ one. Everyone has a different situation though, so basing one's decision on other people's experiences may not always work. 
